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Archive for the 'Rants' Category


{Posted in Rants on December 4th, 2013 by Scott }

Can I just say this about that? And I mean it to be taken in the spirit of love and understanding that it’s being offered.

But to everyone out there who may be doing a diet of one sort or another. . . . and who, when ordering at a restaurant, feels the need to explain in varying degrees of detail to anyone and everyone present that you’re on a special low carb, high carb, low fat, high fat, no meat, nothing but meat, no gluten (whatever the fuck that is) diet. . . . please. PLEASE realize that none of us fucking care.

The server at the restaurant who is rolling his/her eyes at you doesn’t care.

And your friends and family, who have all heard you go through your explanation, many times already, about why you need the kitchen to leave the bun off the burger (What?!?! You can’t take it off yourself?), certainly don’t care.

Just order your damn food already and save the explanations.

Because nobody gives a shit about your diet.


{Posted in America, Barack Obama, Military Stuff, Rants on September 6th, 2013 by Scott }

So Louisiana and Texas have decided that their respective National Guards won’t process benefits for same sex couples who are serving Guard members or same sex spouses of same.

Well, as a smarter man than I observed — someone needs to explain to these fucking lizard-brained, mouth-breathing governors just exactly what the Supremacy Clause means. And, “If you’re the local National Guard warlord, those offices don’t allow you to declare your office to be the Independent Republic Of Whatever The Fuck I Like.”

If I were Obama I get on the phone to Governor Goodhair of Texas and Governor Bobby “Jesus Rode a Dinosaur” Jindal and tell them both that if they don’t comply with the law, that I’d federalize both their National Guards and deploy them immediately to Afghanistan.

Because hell! It ain’t like Obama needs to get reelected or that he’d get any votes from these two cretin-filled states if he did need to get reelected..


{Posted in Deep Thought, My Life, Rants on May 24th, 2013 by Scott }

Cross-posted from my Facebook page.

I have two types of friends/acquaintances who are in recovery — the first type is the type that you can go out with and who will not only NOT have a problem with you having a cocktail in front of them, but who will actually be perfectly fine with offering to buy a round of drinks in spite of the fact that all they’re drinking is diet soda or iced tea.

The second type is the type who, when you order a cocktail in front of them, will get a thoughtful/concerned look on his or her face and ask you, “Has alcoholism run in your family?” Or, even more directly, “Would you like to go to a meeting with me?” Both of which I’ve been asked at one time or another by a person in recovery and both times the question was prompted solely by my having ordered a cocktail at a cocktail appropriate time and place.

The latter are people to whom I refer as the Misery Loves Company Crowd and who tend to believe that it is simply impossible for another human being to enjoy an alcoholic beverage from time to time without also being an alcoholic just like them.

Needless to say; the latter are people with whom I tend to limit my social activities. Not because I drink so much — but because I can’t stand their sense of smug superiority/feigned concern when confronted with people who like to drink but who actually don’t have a drinking problem.


{Posted in Military Stuff, Rants on February 14th, 2013 by Scott }

Apparently the DoD has decided that if you sit your ass at a nice, safe joystick equipped computer monitor in Virginia — or wherever — and you pilot a flying killer robot ten thousand miles away you deserve a fucking combat medal for your “heroism.”

It’s called the Distinguished Warfare Medal and, if you can believe, it ranks higher than the Bronze Star Medal.


For those of you who don’t know what it might take to receive a Bronze Star — here’s what one guy did to get his:

Audie L. Murphy, 01 692 509, First Lieutenant (then Staff Sergeant), Infantry, Company “B”, 15th Infantry Regiment. For valorous conduct in action against the enemy. On the night of 2 March 1944, on the ANZIO BEACHHEAD in Italy, First Lieutenant MURPHY crept 100 yards over flat, open terrain during a fire fight between his small patrol and a group of Germans, to a point 50 yards from a partly disabled enemy tank. Taking careful aim, he fired several rifle grenades at the tank, hitting and completely destroying it. Then, when a great many enemy machine guns in the sector opened up, he led his men through the bullet swept area to safety.     

Oh, and this Audie Murphy guy?  In addition to the TWO Bronze Stars he managed to collect, he also received three Purple Hearts for wounds in action, the Legion of Merit, two Silver Stars {the nation’s third highest combat decoration}, the Distinguished Service Cross (the nation’s second highest combat decoration}, and The Medal of Honor.

You don’t get a fucking combat medal unless you’re physically engaged with an enemy and present at the fucking actual site of the combat.

This is a disgrace.


{Posted in America, Deep Thought, Rants on December 14th, 2012 by Scott }

Here’s the deal — we stomped all over the GOP a month ago in the elections and handed them their collective asses because we don’t like what they’re peddling.

So no!  There’s no fucking reason to reach a compromise.

Or to be bipartisan.

Or to seek a grand fucking bargain with a group of theocratic, retrograde, know-nothing, plutocrat fellating, nihilist douchebags.

Just let the Bush tax cuts for the very wealthy expire, don’t agree to raise the age for Medicare, don’t fuck with Social Security, and let the fucking car go over the “fiscal cliff” if need be.

Every man Jack of us will know who’s to blame if the shit goes bad, and guess what?

It won’t be the Dems.

And it won’t be that bad.

Losing the Bush tax cuts will be great for the country, the people have no interest in seeing the age for Medicare raised, or of any fuckery happening with Social Security — and going over the “fiscal cliff” won’t really do all that much except reduce the deficit.

Which is what all the fucking deficit scolds and Very Serious People™ want anyway, right?

I mean Jesus H. Christ on a fucking Carnival Lines cruise to the Turks and Caicos!  Its not that fucking difficult!!!

We elected you pig fuckers to do the shit we want, not what the republican arsonists who are holding this country hostage want.

So fucking do it already!


{Posted in America, Assholes, Election 2012, Rants, The Republican Clown Car on August 1st, 2012 by Scott }

Sooooo in case anyone missed it yesterday, Texas is about to send to the United States Senate a man who actually managed to run to the right of Governor Goodhair.

Ted Cruz just won a runoff election against ultra-conservative Governor Perry’s handpicked candidate, David Dewhurst — a man who also happens to be the sitting Lieutenant Governor of the state — by running as an EVEN MORE CONSERVATIVE CANDIDATE.

This was the guy Rand Paul and Sahria Plain Sarah Palin came to Texas to campaign for because he’s actually crazier and stupider than they are.

Cruz is a far right lunatic who believes that Sharia Law is an enormous problem in the U.S. and is also an outright nullifier, believing that the individual states have the right under the Constitution to nullify federal laws that they don’t agree with.

Which of course those of you who took history lessons in grade school will recall was one of the reasons we fought a civil war over — a war that took 600,000 American lives.

Cruz also believes that George Soros is behind a secret United Nations plot to eliminate the game of golf.

And this is the guy that Texans feel will make the best representative for them in the United States Senate.

And he’s gonna go the U.S. Senate in November because in the cloud cuckoo land that Texas has become there is simply no possible way for Cruz’ Democratic opponent to beat him come November.

Seriously Texas, you guys really should secede from the Union.

It’d make a bunch of shithouse rat crazy Texans happy {until you turned your new nation into Myanmar and we had to build a fence to keep you fucking imbeciles out of America} and it would be absolutely great for the rest of us.

Because we’d finally be shed of you preening, narcissistic completely bugfuck insane Texas twatwaffles once and for all.

And for those of you Longhorns who intend to take deep and abiding umbrage at how I’ve characterized you and your state, you can never again take me to task for the public contempt that I show toward all things Texas.

Because I have just three words for you . . . .

Ted fucking Cruz

‘Nuff said.


{Posted in America, Rants on June 18th, 2012 by Scott }

Forty years ago yesterday a bunch of two-bit crooks working for the Committee to Re-elect the President {CREEP} were arrested burglarizing the offices of the Democratic National Committee in the Watergate office complex in Washington D.C.

Two years later, under threat of conviction in an impeachment trial, Richard Nixon resigned the presidency in disgrace.

That historical denouement was made possible by the press doing its job, elected representatives from both parties doing their jobs, the judiciary doing its job, appointed officials of the Justice Department who had sworn to uphold the Constitution doing their jobs, and the citizens of this nation doing our jobs by registering our complete and utter outrage at what had occurred.

The system did, indeed, work.


But we learned nothing from it.

Because if we had then Ronald Reagan would have been impeached and sent to jail for Iran/Contra.

And Bush v. Gore never would have happened.

And John Yoo would never have been able to get near a Justice Department computer to write his memo saying that it was perfectly fine for us to torture people.

And George W. Bush and Dick Cheney would have been handed over to a war crimes court at the Hague.

And we’d be drawing up articles of impeachment against Barack Obama for ordering the murder of American citizens without due process.

Yeah, forty years ago an event once aptly described as, “The hour of the Founders, come round at last,” occurred and we all did our jobs and the system worked — but clearly, we learned absolutely nothing from it.