MORANS
Yet another scientific study has just been released that conclusively demonstrates that conservatives are pretty much Teh Stooopid.
It found, using a number of criteria and almost 3,000 study subjects, that conservatism and cognitive ability were negatively correlated { for you conservatards reading this that means the more conservative you are the dumber you are}.
Doughy Pantload over at The Corner vehemently disagrees with the entire study — even though he admits that he didn’t read the fucking thing and as Sadly No! astutely observed, thereby establishing a whole new data point in support of the study’s findings.
And if you doubt that conservatives are fucking idiots just take a look at this screen grab from an ad by the National Organization for Marriage — the front group currently claiming that heterosexuals will be forced to have man-on-man butt sex and that the world will end if Teh Gays are allowed to marry.
{Note: for you conservative readers it’s the bits that are underlined in red that I’m drawing your attention to……because the word same is repeated……..and the word marriage is misspelled……….in an advertisement…..done by professionals…..to be viewed by the public…..and representing the advertisers sole mission and entire reason for being…… crickets}
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On a related note, I’m really curious to know if this blog still has any conservative readers left or if I’ve managed to run them all off.
If you self-identify as a conservative please, post a comment in the comment section letting me know that you’re out there. Or just drop me an email at scott@billinexile.com.
I’m announcing amnesty {for this post only} to conservative comment posters who come forward and claim their mantle. For this one post I promise not to attack you for your political conservatism or say mean things about the comments that you write.
Seriously.
May 28th, 2009 at 11:56 am
Scott,
Having spent 20 years in the Navy, and lived with my partner for 8 years I would have to say I’m a conservative. My desire to formalize our relationship to ensure our children are provided for also makes me a conservative.
However, the actions of so called conservatives allows me to self identify as a bleeding heart liberal.
What I really don’t forgive the religious “right” for is thier attempt to own god. As a formerly religious person I have come to despise jesus and god based on the actions of american churches. Our so called religious leaders have driven me from god. My only question is “Am I alone? Have others come to despise religion also?”
Where is my protection from their religious persecution? I have to close with Fuck Jesus, Fuck God and Fuck America.
Kelly L.
USN Retired.
May 28th, 2009 at 12:42 pm
You’re not alone, Kelly. The Catholic church drove me right into atheism. I think more harm has been done in the name of religion than in the name of any other cause.
May 28th, 2009 at 1:09 pm
If Barrack Obama doesn’t step up to the plate on Gay Marriage and DADT, my vote next time around will most definitely go to ANYONE BUT HIM – including a Conservative Wingnut Fucktard Douche. Shame on Barrack Obama for his disgraceful lack of leadership on the last remaining civil rights issue in this ridiculously regressive society called America.
May 28th, 2009 at 2:38 pm
Little Rock, it’s been four months. Breathe — in through the nose, out the mouth — take a few deep breaths. During the election he said he doesn’t believe in gay marriage, so why expect him to push for it at a national level? And regarding, DADT, he’s been pretty adamant he wants it repealed but that starts with the House, so get on the Speaker’s ass but when the bill repealing DADT comes to the President’s desk, he will sign it.
May 28th, 2009 at 3:17 pm
Jeff, excuse me for expecting the first black president to be sensitive to an issue of civil rights. If not from Barrack Obama, whom then? Just whom should we expect leadership from in the Democrat Party? He did what he needed to do to get elected and now he’s thrown us under the bus.
The Commander In Chief has all the power to, with one executive order, relegate DADT to the dustbin of history. THAT would be change we could believe in. Instead, there’s been very little reform of the banking industry, no movement on healthy care, no indication that he plans to do much of anything different from his predecessors. Arianna Huffington hit the nail on the head with regards to the president’s grade for his first 100 days in office. F. And until the LGBT Community starts to make it clear that our votes are not to be taken for granted, I suspect we can still slouch to the back of the bus, careful along the way there to avoid eye-contact with our righteous straight brethren, sit our gay asses down, and expect the same old shit. And shame on any gay person who quietly prays and hopes that things will be different if we only wait for a president who will champion our cause.
That is all.
May 28th, 2009 at 3:33 pm
I’m no tory (I’m a socialist) but the ’stupid conservative’ meme has a long history, and is pretty much false, as much of a party pooper as that is. Both sides have traditionally had people from the full spectrum of educated to stoopid, as well as wealthy to poor. At different times they’ve also had different social mores, with sometimes the Left being more conservative. The big difference – as shown by Scott’s photos of dumb X’ians – is that an extreme element is taking over (has taken over?) the Republican Party, and extremism is more attractive to less educated people.
BTW, the assumption that people get more conservative as they get older is also false. Data shows people make up their mind around 28-30 yr old, and then stay that way unless something massive happens (like, say, a really crazy President takes them into 2 unwinnable wars and trashes the constitution, or they’re black and a black guy runs for office, etc).
May 28th, 2009 at 5:42 pm
That’s OK; you probably think I can’t read and only look at the pictures, so no offence taken. Its fun to read your rants; you’re better at it than many out there. Gotta read what the other side says, you know!
May 28th, 2009 at 6:30 pm
Odd paper. However, the purpose is not to say that Conservatives are Stooopid (did I get the right number of “o”’s?), rather that “low cognitive ability is associated with high conservatism”. Not the other way round:
“The purpose of this paper was to examine the evidence
relevant to the hypothesis that low cognitive ability is asso-
ciated with high conservatism. This hypothesis can be derived
from the theory that sees political conservatism as motivated
cognition (Jost et al., 2003) and from Wilson’s (1973) dynamic
theory of conservatism. Our evidence supports this hypothesis.
Conservatism correlates negatively with measures of cognitive
ability and educational achievement at both individual- and
country levels of analysis. We cannot make any statements
about the causality, however.”
He finds a correlation between fear of change (a definition of why someone is conservative) and low cognitive ability. No causality is claimed (low cognition causes conservatism, or the reverse).
This paper is published by the National Institute of Education in Singapore.
May 29th, 2009 at 4:57 pm
A– So how many conservatives DID we expect to be posting, right below a feature of a Leatherette Queen spoiling her manicure with ass juices? LOL
B– Underestimating enemies is dangerous — if they got that shithead Bush elected, some of them MUST be smart, and the ones who were stupid were the Democrats who let them come close enough to pull the Florida thing.
I can’t exactly admire the stupid ones who are closer to our side:
the PETA people who put on their website that fish sticks are made from tortured Sea Kittens
the liberals in Santa Monica who complained that a dishwasher with 11 children deserved a high wage from his employer (rather than telling him to train for a better job if he wanted lots of kids)
May 30th, 2009 at 1:26 am
Depends on what you mean by “conservative,” Scott (and yeah, not only have you brought me outta retirement with this post, you’ve even got me upper-casing–which means i totally expect you to properly paragraph this shit as quid pro quo).
If, by “conservative,” you mean “Republican” in its current definition, then no, i’m not a conservative.
If, on the other hand, you’re by chance alluding to the classic conservative principles (which the modern Republican party long ago abandoned) of limited government and limited spending, then yeah, count me among that number.
And you wanna know why, Scott? It’s an interesting question–over the years, I’ve been accused by my liberal friends of being cheap, stingy and non-progressive, but the truth is much simpler than that.
Bottom line: I’m a conservative because I fucking hate WASTE–because, see, I know that, for every dollar pumped into the federal government, at least 75 cents of said hard-earned dollar is wasted before it ever gets to its intended target.
And why is this, you might ask? Well, i’ll tell you why (actually, i’ll tell your readers why, because, smart boy that you are, Scott, i know you already know): because when it’s not your money–when you don’t have a dog in the fight–you don’t give a rat’s ass how efficiently the money’s spent, because you know that when Fannie Mae/Freddie Mac, or [insert name of federal sinkhole here] goes down the tubes, it won’t bite you in the ass–the dumbass public won’t connect the dots, and you’ll still be re-elected and go on to fuck up another day.
It’s shit like this that drives me crazy, Scott–because unlike Barney Frank and Chris Dodd and Nancy Pelosi–among many others of both parties who should’ve been de-elected for their egregious sins, and most unjustly were not–I work damned hard for my money.
AND I HATE TO SEE IT WASTED.
That’s why i–among many tens (maybe even hundreds) of millions of other hard-working americans–you know, the ones you so love to condescendingly sneer at–am a conservative. You get that, Scott?
And by the way, fuck your kind offer of amnesty; while i may have demonstrated any number of drunken character flaws in my previous comments to this fine blog, fear of the big bad wolf was never chief among them–feel free to do your worst.
May 30th, 2009 at 6:16 am
Yawn
May 31st, 2009 at 12:18 am
yeah, that’s about what i figured i’d get back
June 3rd, 2009 at 11:01 am
mkf,
I might have been more impressed with your argument had you not limited your list of “spendthrifts” to 3 Democrats who don’t control the country’s treasury but instead mentioned some of the Republicans of the last 8 years who wasted billions and billions of dollars on a needless war, on no-bid contracts with corporate friends, and just disappearing millions of dollars on a pallet somewhere in the Iraqi desert. That’s why I know to never take conservatives seriously on fiscal issues – they only care when they aren’t in charge of wasting it.