Hey little sister who's your Superman?


So Louisiana and Texas have decided that their respective National Guards won’t process benefits for same sex couples who are serving Guard members or same sex spouses of same.

Well, as a smarter man than I observed — someone needs to explain to these fucking lizard-brained, mouth-breathing governors just exactly what the Supremacy Clause means. And, “If you’re the local National Guard warlord,┬áthose offices don’t allow you to declare your office to be the Independent Republic Of Whatever The Fuck I Like.”

If I were Obama I get on the phone to Governor Goodhair of Texas and Governor Bobby “Jesus Rode a Dinosaur” Jindal and tell them both that if they don’t comply with the law, that I’d federalize both their National Guards and deploy them immediately to Afghanistan.

Because hell! It ain’t like Obama needs to get reelected or that he’d get any votes from these two cretin-filled states if he did need to get reelected..

13 Responses to “FUCK ‘EM!”

  1. calcarl Says:

    Good God just secede already. In fact, since Texas has been such a tease about this, lets just federate their asses. They can both go together – the Chevron Republic.

  2. James Says:

    Red States only like soldiers when they are straight.

  3. Laura Says:

    I didn’t know about Louisiana but when I first read that Texas was doing this I wondered if they had the autonomy to do so. I didn’t think so. While Obama’s federalizing Texas and Louisiana National Guards, why doesn’t he federalize Wisconsin’s as well to stop the bullshit that’s going on in the capital there.

  4. Todd in DC Says:

    Sometimes I think the North really did lose the Civil War. What the hell did the South ever do to benefit the rest of us?

  5. Rob Says:

    Ya! Scott, the blogger is finally back! I know you’ve been busy, but I’ve missed reading your points of view! Welcome back and hopefully you are settling in well in Louisville!

  6. miquel Says:

    …………………………MEXAS STRIKES AGAIN!……………………….

    Hey has any BIE readers been down to ‘Niggerhead’ for lil vaca this season??

  7. James Says:


    Sweet tea, Louis Armstrong, Lester Young, Eudora Welty, William Faulkner and John Coltrane.


  8. Damien Says:

    I love how everyone loves to bag my old home state of Florida, and yet Texas is clearly the winner in the “Most BatShit Crazy State of the Union”.

    They should secede. And all that Federal funding they receive can be put to those little things that Texans say are worthless – you know……… Education, Health, Crime and Safety etc.

  9. Will Says:

    I think we have to expect a lot of this sort of thing given the “States’ Rights” aspect of the continuing LGBT push for total Equality. The prejudice against us runs very deep in some places and they will try to keep us down as long as possible and by any means possible.

    As for secession, I doubt many in these states have seriously and in sufficient enough detail studied the implications of leaving the United States. The economic losses alone, over a very broad spectrum of lost Federal involvement, could be disastrous. One or two states on the Gulf who have major ports might make a go of it, at least for a while, but have they considered the larger picture of establishing an entire Foreign Relations system with Embassies throughout the world, etc. etc. Many of these states also score very low on the educational achievement scale which won’t provide their new national governments with skilled Ambassadors, for example, as just one example among many.

    I would expect that there would be a gay/lesbian exodus back into the United States, further brain draining a states that broke away. Industry has been aware of the value of a vibrant, creative gay population when choosing places to locate. I think secession is a red herring, but it actually would be interesting and perhaps fun to watch a couple give it a try.

  10. Eric Says:

    James; You forgot Tennessee Williams and Truman Capote. You know, I am a gay man living in Alabama and I am getting tired of people slagging on the South all the time. There are educated, well-traveled, culturally literate people in the South. It isn’t all rednecks. Furthermore, I have heard homphobic comments while living In New York City and San Francisco and Seattle, as well. Over-generalizing doesn’t help things and it is disrespectful to the openly gay people that live in the South and try in whatever way they can to make it a better place.

  11. Manny Says:

    In 2013, our President will be Fatima Obama, granddaughter of Barack and 1st elected Muslim president . Republican “scientists” will be denying Climate Change. The Koch Daughters will be buying California. And Texas politicians would be “threatening” to secede from the Union.

  12. Manny Says:

    My bad, i meant to write 2063; then my satire makes sense.

  13. TominSF Says:

    @Eric: AMEN! I live in San Francisco and there’s still a lot of bigotry here in the liberal bastion of the US. I’ve also been to the South and have relatives there. My brother and his family lived in Lubbock, Texas for a few years – using this as an example, not saying Texas is actually part of the “Deep South” :) . They were Unitarians and got their congregation to adopt an “Inclusive Congregation” toward LGBT people. No matter where you are, whether it be places like SF, NY, France or Uganda, and Russia there are people all over the spectrum. We should never lose sight of that. A majority does not define a universality. A minority does not define a non-existence. Pretending that any locality is not deserving of our support does an injustice to us all.

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